TAR, and Drinks. Oh how there were drinks...

Yep,

Milestone time.
This is in fact my 15th post.
Suck it Trebeck.

The Monday before TAR I had no real intentions of going. I was invited by Travis and "his Missus" to go a way a back when he found out, but wasn't ever just committed to leaving work behind. On said Monday, my lady broke up with me and I was sad. So sad that I decided to ride in a car for a total of 12 hours. St. Louis. Land of the GD cardinals fan... Just a sea of red. For most of the weekend the closest we saw to a cubs fan was the ugly blue hat that Travis was wearing along with the hat Travis was making Ed wear. MC Hammer tweets way too much. I didn't take but one picture, of one person, that didn't even make a serious face, so i will not be posting my 'reels' of film.. I stole some. In the best chronological order to my 512 braincells I have remaining..This would be a picture of us arriving. Everyone is smiling but me. I think its because my hat was so tight or my head was so big. Oorrrrr, I felt silly meeting everyone in gray holy shorts and a stretched out white t shirt. Nigs was at the door waiting on us. FLASH! "who are you?" FLASH!
We gots Me, (hey, I put a conversation starting shirt on that really just reminded me that I was dumped and yes, that is scotch in my hand) Coffeypot (Just walking with his GD SEC hat) Travis (looking at his wife who is singing what I can only tell to be a Motown song, maybe Smokey Robinson) His Missus (singing what I can only tell to be a Motown song, maybe The Isley Brothers, it looks like she's snapping ) and the photographer's 24 year old sister, Barb (I bet she thinks His Missus is singing some Choker Campbell and His 16 piece band. We are headed for the Hard Rock.Yes, that is a Long Island Ice Tea in front of me. Yes I think its my 3rd. Yes I can dance better than you. Yes I am sweating for no reason. Hell, t was the Hard Rock. I had a club sandwich...Now, Bambi, the 25 year old photographing older sister, used this as an example of the heavy rain that came down upon us... I still say it's just sweat. Hang loose. MMMmmmMMMmm Stella. STELLAAAA!Look who finally put down the camera.. Look who finally showed.. Look who can't really see who's taking the picture..Look at Ed just wishing I would stop yelling..

I yell some more and the night fades into nothing. The sisters leave and I Drunk text..

So i wake up after a well rested night and go find out what The Druery Inn has for breakfast. Then find out its time for the arch. We hit that up, then run a muck around the mall babbling about what and where to eat for way longer than we should have. I thought we were gonna have a couple people fall out. My ribs were good, but what a horrible place atmosphere wise. There wasn't a smile in the place. If it wasn't for us, I'm sure someone would have offed themselves. More than likely the bartender. From there, we bought Liquor and Beer from a shop in the Mall (oh yeah) and headed back for some Vacation R&R (meaning everyone wanted a nap.)

This picture has absolutely nothing to do with me. Honestly, I just want to here Travis make one more Jersey Shore Joke. C'mon man, You gotta get pictures of all the chicks that came down.......... just dudes in a hot tub.. I never went swimming with him again.


I sure as hell drank with him again. Ladies and Gentlemen, The OH Shit! Jager and 151.
After 4 shots of Jager, one oh shit, 2 151 shots, and 4 beers, I was ready for a night on the town. That Jeff cat is a cool son of a bitch. I asked Shayna (desk lady at the Druery) where the spots were, she has yet to tell me. She looked me straight in the face and told me she's not big on the "popped collar" scene. She must have thought I was with the (you ready?) Jersey Shore bachelor party. Ooor she doesn't like talking to fat guys. I get it. Really..
There's Coffey, Posin' like a Posta. I'm drinkin like I'm sposta.. Its almost cut off time, it looks like I have a lazy eye starting up. It was a nice night, but once again, we chose the wrong place to sit down. They made us buy appetizers, or they wouldn't serve us at all. Then started chaining up chairs to tables so no one else could sit down while a 54 year old bald guy did Bob Marley covers inside. I can talk shit, but I was singing "No Woman, No Cry" when he started it up. Good Calamari, bad Mary...

So, the next morning we tried to catch the Brewery tour and ended up there too early.

I'm still sleepy and I'm not drinking for months..

It took me like 2 hours to do this shiz.. I am now 12 minutes past Memoir Monday. I guess it is now tell me about what happened last weekend Tuesday. Yeah that's right. TMAWHLWT.

What..?
I keep it real.

MC Hammer is still tweeting like a mad man..

OU Texas, Pregame speech.

This is what I’d tell the team if I were giving the pregame speech:

Sam (Bradford), you are the leader. You are a Heisman trophy winner. We will need your leadership. You have to keep your chin up and your head in the game for 4 quarters no matter what.

DeMarco (Murry), you are always one step away from the big play. Just one step away from greatness, let’s make it happen.

Chirs (Brown), Sr., you’ve been doing a good job hitting the holes and running north and south and running hard. Give me two more yards out of each run. Every time!

Matt (Clap), another Sr., get out there and put that defensive end on his ass. Right now, until the end of the game, I want his knees shaking thinking we are running off tackle again.

WR- Guys, Catch and tuck. Catch and tuck. You all have the capability to make great plays, just concentrate. Make the catch; tuck the ball, then go make the magic happen. Keep your head up, play ball, score touchdowns.

Offensive line, Guys, I bet you could move a bulldozer. Get low, get underneath their pads and push them 10 yards down field. Let’s play smash mouth football. Give your QB time to get the ball down field. He’s not just going to hold on to it. We Need 3 more seconds, block them low, get those hands down, something. Let’s blast them off the ball and get them sucking air. Don’t forget to pick up the blitz.

D Line, Contain!! Attack McCoy from the outside. Flush him up into the heart of the defense. Let him take a few shots from our LBs, or our hour hard hitting secondary. Hit him hard. Hit him clean. Create turnovers! English, Beal, Let’s get ‘em!

Linebackers, Reynolds, you have to get this D pumped. I see you as the leader. Get in their heads. Get the D fired up. Make plays. Force 2 and 3 and longs. Don’t forget about those flats. And most importantly, wrap up. Tackle, Tackle, Tackle! Lewis, I want to see you in the end zone today.

DBs, McCoy is just going to throw to Shipley or his tight end. You have a great LB crew in front of you, but don’t be afraid to come up and make a tackle. Play the pass first. Be in the right places. Make them make poor decisions and let’s score points. 2 picks, I need 2, and we win this game.

Special Teams! Field position! I can’t express how important it is going to be today. We have to make big plays. Have to. Let’s stay in our lanes and make good solid tackles.

You are the best, every one of you. The media can say what they want, but you wouldn’t be here if you weren’t the best. We have something to prove today, Sooners, we have to prove that we are better than the 2 points that gave us our two loses. Seniors.., this is the last time you will play at the Cotton Bowl… Most of you freshman here have been thinking about this your entire life. It’s Game Day. It’s Game Time. If you play like I know you can, and leave it all on the field… all I have left is one question, who wants to beat Texas?

Oct. 3

Woo, last week was a doooosie. I got six picks wrong! Upsets er’where! We’ll see about this week.

I’ve got #22 Michigan over Michigan State.
Wisconsin over Minnesota - Minnesota could easily stick it in my butt on this pick.
#4 LSU over #18 Georgia - I mean c’mon… Georgia got beat my OK State!
# 15 Penn State over The Fightin’ Illini of Illinois. - I like Juice Williams but Illinois is not Iowa. I don’t think they can pull of the upset.
UCLA over Stanford- This is a toss up for sure. 3-0 vs. 3-1 unranked teams.
Notre Dame over Washington – If it was at Washington, they might have the mustard.
Arkansas over Texas A&M - This was a tough pick for me, A&M has the better record at 3-0 but they just don’t do it for me. Razorbacks get it done at Jerry's world.
Auburn over Tennessee – Are you kidding me, a SEC team that is 4-0 and not ranked??
USC over Cal – USC slipped up against Washington, and Cal got owned by Oregon, don’t expect for USC to slip against Cal.

#8 Oklahoma over #17 Miami –
Miami's attempt to bounce back after its first loss of the season won't be easy as Oklahoma comes to town. The Sooners have pitched back-to-back shutouts since losing to BYU in their opener. The Hurricanes have a 2-1 edge in Miami, where the teams haven't met since the Canes beat OU for the national title in 1988. If OU’s D line and O line come to play, it’s going to be OU all the way. The offensive line needs to pick up blitzes from a defense a little more talented then their last two opponents. The defensive line needs to put pressure on Jecory Harris, and make big plays. Harris was 9for25 against Va Tech… something to think about.

Monday the 14th

Monday the 14th

I like to give a shout out to the Houston Cougars. Beating an over rated # 5 Oklahoma State. That’s so effing awesome! Also, Boomer Sooner on the Shut out! I know it’s just Idaho State, but a shut out is a shut out. That’s like No Hitting the Nationals. A no hitter is a no hitter. Good job D! I got 6 picks out of 10 correct this week in college football. Not the best week, however I’m still sitting over 50%.
The NFL on the other hand, I got all but 2 of the games picked correctly. The 49ers surprised everyone I think, and I really wanted the bears to pull that shiz out. There are still two NFL games tonight. I kind of want Buffalo to beat the Pats, but I picked the Pats. I’ve got the Chargers picked over the Raiders too.
Monday…

Opening Saturday!

Hooray Tulsa! That’s 1 pick.

Several teams kick off the football season today. This makes me very happy. I will be watching the Georgia Oklahoma State game, the Oklahoma BYU game, and then I’ll be catching the end of the Alabama Virginia Tech game.

#13 Georgia @ #9 Oklahoma State
As much as I hate to do it, I think I’m going to stick to my BIG XII guns here and go with OK State. OSU opens the season with their highest ranking in 30 some odd years. Georgia did put the hurt on State at Athens in ’07, but being in Stillwater, with Boone Pickens to pay billions of dollars to anyone and everyone, I think State will pull it out. The Bulldogs front 4 won’t put enough pressure on Zack Robinson, giving him time to throw the ball deep and make plays with his feet. If they beat Georgia, they will be favored in the next 6 games, giving them a chance to be 7-0 going into a home game against #2 Texas. #9 Oklahoma State by 10

#3 Oklahoma vs. #20 BYU
The Sooners, hands down. Not only is this my favorite college football team, but I believe that the Sooners just have to many offensive weapons and 9 returning starters on defense that will help them return to Norman with a victory. Rumored to be the best defense under stoops, the Safety positions will be the weak spots going into the season (2 of 11 starters that didn’t return.). BYU is sure to score some points with a deep threat passing offense, but can they score enough to keep up with the most powerful offense in the nation..? Look for Mossis Madu to get some hand offs and catch some short passes with monstrous YAC form the slot position. 2 1,000 yard returning running backs in Brown and Murry will also take turns breaking down the D line and opening up the play action pass. My only concern is Sooners Special Teams play. Will they stay in their lanes? #3 Oklahoma by 21

#5 Alabama vs. #7 Virginia Tech
In this Primetime match up, I’m picking SEC over ACC. Nick Saban promised to bring football back to the tide and so far, he’s done a pretty good job. Alabama is starting a new QB in Greg McElroy, but he still has the advantage of tossing the ball to a veteran receiver corp. I think the Bama D if going to be the deciding factor in this game. Look for this one to be decided in the 4th quarter. Alabama by 7

Everyone, enjoy your Saturday.